31/08/24 - West Midlands Metro Pub Crawl - Part 1

Orange Chips

A Simple Plan - navigate the West Midlands Metro line to have a drink in the nearest pub to every station. Before setting off, I used AI to put together a list, including opening times. There's only one way to validate accuracy and that's to explore. As there are now 35 stations (and extensions planned), I expect this to take a couple of trips. I'll start at one end and introduce a three station gap, repeating until I have reached completion.

#	Station	Nearest AI Recommendation	Actual Nearest
1	Wolverhampton St Georges	The George Wallis	The Wheatsheaf

First things first, the trams dont actually run to Wolverhampton St Georges now, replaced by Wolverhampton Railway Station. It obviously costs too much to replace the branch lines on the map. Never mind, its an easy walk from Pipers Row, which does mean I have to set my first rule. No pub repetition.

The Wheatsheaf is an 11am opener - perfect for my needs on my first visit to the Hawthorns in the new season. A reminder that I am deep in enemy territory, with the ceiling festooned with Wolves flags.

A Marstons House, the Banks Bitter Amber was decent but chilled to the bone. A jukebox blaring out Elvis and his Suspicious Mind. Rather a nice front room, with a fire place and outside seating in a little courtyard. I am off to a decent start and the barstaff called me "Angel" for returning my glass.

The plan is off to a fine start ....

#	Station	Nearest AI Recommendation	Actual Nearest
2	The Crescent	The New Inn	The Horse and Jockey

If you find the "Anvil Headed Lady", you are there

Ha! The Trumpet in Bilston has been on my "to visit" list for an age. Yet the Horse and Jockey is 0.1m closer and I can't be breaking the rules so soon. Bravery required to enter the Horse and Jockey. A pub that is marked as closed on Pubsgalore (how nice to get to declare it open) and having next to no information on WhatPub.

A Guinness ordered and a seat taken to see how to enter the conversation. Of course, all the chat is about Oasis Tickets and it would seem everyone and his brother have been having a go. Hell, I even tried (for my kids) for at least 20 minutes before heading out with better things to do. There was no success for anyone here but my acceptance in their local was gained by recycling twitter jokes.

Don't be sad. You can create your own live Oasis experience at home.

Simply stand 2 immobile action figurines at the end of your garden, drink some warm beer, play any literally Slade single at 33rpm, and set fire to £150.

— Russ Jones (@RussInCheshire) August 31, 2024

Big laughs, but by this time of the day, the joke should have been £357.  

A possibility for the Trumpet when I stop at Bilston High Street.

An enjoyable Guinness

#	Station	Nearest AI Recommendation	Actual Nearest
3	Bradley Lane	The Bradley	The Fiery Grill

AI has got the nearest pub incorrect twice but it really pushes the boat out this time by recommending a pub that doesn't even exist. 

The Bradley: A community pub with a relaxed setting and affordable drinks. Opening hours: 12:00 PM - 11:00 PM 

Sounds lovely. I think I may draw a blank here but Google Maps shows a Fiery Grill not too far of a walk away. If the worst comes to pass, I need lunch anyway. Good news - its definitely a (desi) pub. Bad news, despite advertising all the football action - with a game in flight - it doesn't open until 1pm.

It could have been a spectacular lunch

A chipper around the corner and I lose my orange chips virginity. Honestly, once you have them, you cannot go back to regular. I am ruined for life. Once demolished, there are signs of life at the front and I am the first in for a half of Staropramen. They even turn the TV on for me. An Andi Wieman wonderstrike.

#	Station	Nearest AI Recommendation	Actual Nearest
4	Black Lake	The Queens Head	The Queens Head

AI actually gets one right!

A bit of a trek from Black Lake Station and then I need to convince the bouncer that I can come in.

In the foyer

I stand at the bar without service, until an old boy takes pity on me and says I need to ring the bell. Teenage bar staff appear in seconds to serve me a ropey half of Butty Bach. Looks a lively place on the evening, with an awful lot of karaoke equipment.

File under "Fun Pub".

Or Adult Creche

So, two trads, a desi and a back from the dead, semi-secret community local. A promising start.

The tram whisks me off to the Hawthorns for the annual "I'll give it one more season" game. We're looking good!