24/08/26 - A Hackney Pub Crawl

On a Monday? Madness....

My second walk from the Joolz Rather Splendid London Pub Walks. The YouTube video for an overview on the area, where he gets rather too excited about coal holes and stink pipes.

Attempting a pub crawl on a Monday is a challenge. My advance ticket means I need to be at Euston for the cancelled 3.26pm. The first handful of the pubs don't open until 3 or 4pm. So part of this crawl is virtual. Use you imagination. I did.

Royal Inn on the Park - next to Victoria Park.

Kenton Arms - gorgeous.

The Gun, less gorgeous

And the Chesham Arms

Saved time from boozing provides more time for investigation. Of a personal kind. I worked for Great Universal Stores - which also contained Burberry before it was requisitioned by the underclass. I found myself at Chatham Place, the former head office. Where as a teenager database programmer I used to (attempt to) eat watermelon in the Director's restaurant.

A factory outlet now.... and flats

For a full appreciation of Umit and Sons, watch the video. A most unusual shop, with the tiniest of cinemas contained within. This week showing "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly".

A real one-off

If you have watched the video, you will know that Joolz likes to cosplay as an Edwardian Dandy. I am amazed that he escaped with his teeth/life (delete as applicable) in his choice of boozer. The Crown - and the mobile shop they have extended into next door - the half crown. The veteran pub tickers on Pubsgalore claim it to be faux-Irish - even if they do have a sign saying I love fecking Ireland and sell Tayto crisps.

Crown and Half Crown

There's no denying it's a drinkers' pub. It's only been open 10 minutes and already busy with quite frankly, ill-looking men, some of whom are already double loading on the Stella. Friendly enough if you can handle banter but I am unsure how they would have taken to our Joolz.

Proper boozers out of shot. No real ale, so (a decent and cheap) Guinness

The Cock is an unexpected surprise. I noticed the Good Beer Guide 2026 sticker on the door of this shabby-chic ex-Trumans pub. The beer and cider range is comprehensive enough and of sufficient quality to justify its regular appearance. 

The Cock

A lot to admire - my Howling Hops Upper Crust Red IPA was delicious and only just over £4. Remember, I am in London. The barman/owner gave off Black Books vibes, trying desperately to plough through a huge novel, whilst thirsty punters interrupted his reading flow.

And who could fail to be impressed with the speed of the pickled egg eaters?

Some serious attention to timings there - Jack holding his own against the Simons

And I end at the unusually named Cat and Mutton on the other side of London Fields. Over the years, this ex-Charrington house has had many names, usually a combination of cat, cattle, shoulder and mutton.

More pubby handsomeness

It's decent enough, in a gentrified kind of way. All exposed wood, cat-related artworks and decent music played at a reasonable level. But I am reminded I am in London. 

Five Points XPA for £7.50.

Take me to the cock.

Pub and Dining Room

Walk Details

Distance - 3.75 miles

Walk Inspiration - Joolz Splendid Pub Walks, Walk 15

Previous Joolz Pub Walks - Bayswater

30/07/25 - A Bayswater Bimble

Trivia and Pubs

A new guide book - Joolz Guides - Rather Splendid London Pub Walks. I've got to say, the book and associated videos are beautiful. So much trivia packed into a 4-mile walk. I know some of the pubs and will wait till the end of the blog to comment on whether he knows his boozers as well as he knows London. Although saying that, three of the five pubs are right at the walk's start.

But he does start the Bayswater walk at a beauty - The Victoria, Strathearn Place. Built 1837, the year Vic came to the throne, and largely unchanged since. A rare surviving example of mid-Victorian design, recognised as one of Britain’s Real Heritage Pubs. Inside, you'll find ornately gilded mirrors mounted above a crescent-shaped bar, decorative painted tiles set into wall niches, and numerous portraits of Queen Victoria. A Fuller's House and Good Beer Guide stalwart, of course, I have been here before.

The flatiron shape of the Victoria

Half an ESB resting on mahogany

Most people who visit Hyde Park will be unaware of the Pet Cemetery. Hidden away behind a lodge house at Lancaster Gate and surrounded by hedges. In 1880 the park keeper agreed to bury a dog and Victorian society thought this a fine idea. It quickly got out of hand and is now packed with over 1,000 gravestones.

A gap in the foliage

Home to dogs, cats, birds and three monkeys. George Orwell described it as "perhaps the most horrible spectacle in Britain". Maybe that's why they built a nearly impenetrable hedge.

Pubs 2 and 3 in quick succession. The Swan a bit of a tourist haunt on the Bayswater Road. Always packed with families and staff that are keen to hunt you down with an iPad to take an order on your arrival. Joolz tells a nice story in the video about the dandy highway man, Claude Du Val, who had his last drink there on the way to his execution at Tyburn.

Now purveyors of Fish and Chips 

But that is better than his next choice, the Young's house, The Mitre. It's one of London's Real Ale Heritage pubs but I found it rather soulless if not immaculately clean. Those two sentiments may be related. The Young's special was below average.

Undoubtedly externally handsome  

Back to the Trivia - the false fronted houses of Leinster Gardens hiding a railway line. The wonderful looking Porchester Baths that really deserve a review of the video. Must bring my trunks on my next London visit. 

Rather wonderfully, Joolz points out the door to an underground Austrian cellar bar that I simply have to go to. In fact, I have offered a £5 bounty to the first member of my extended family to enjoy schnitzel, Stiegl beer and an octogenarian on an accordion.

Oompah 

Music and film locations. This is the part of London with those white, colonnaded, stucco fronted four story houses that are as gorgeous, as they are similar. 

Stiff Records at 32 Alexander Street.

With the Damned outside the Front

Rachel Weisz's single mother, textile designer in About a Boy lived at 1 St Stephen's Crescent.

Textile designers are well paid in the movies

Micheal Caine's Alfie lived around the corner at 29 St Stephens Gardens. A location chosen for its run down and gritty appearance, matching the tone of the film. Ha!

And not a lot of people know that

Another pub stop - the instantly forgettable Prince Bonaparte. A pub that belied it's posh art-deco interior by smelling dreadfully of Sunday lunch cabbage on a Wednesday. At least they had Timothy Taylor Landlord on.

Prince Bonaparte

Incredibly, Bayswater was also the location for the flat in Withnail and I. The steps at 57 Chepstow Road used for the publicity shots.

Really do need to watch this, doing the drinking game

And the final trivia point for me - Sting's first home in London. The cellar of 28 Leinster Square now covered in scaffolding. I believe he lives in several castle's with massive driveways now.

Luggage label on his guitar case. If only Laker Airways could have just lost one piece

A couple of churches - one standing in for a Russian Cathedral in Goldeneye and the walk is over at the final pub. The Phoenix is externally covered in scaffolding and internally is that boring that I cannot be bothered to bring you photos. To be fair, Joolz does have the "Rule of Ted". A rule that means "just use any pub that is handy, as often you will spend ages looking for something better.

The "Rule of Ted" does not apply to caskless Greene King pubs.

So - 10/10 for the walk and maybe 6/10 for his pub selection. But maybe Bayswater is poor hunting ground.

Walk Details

Distance - 5 Miles

Geocaches - 5

Walk Inspiration - Rather Splendid Lodon Pub Walks - Walk 17